Animal Dark humor Pickup lines News & politics Bar Puns Knock knock jokes. Vote: share joke. Funny … Q: What is a bear’s favorite drink? When they came back something happens. Joke has 48.25 % from 52 votes. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. From the best clean jokes for adults to funny clean jokes of the day, this big SFW list has something hilarious for everyone: kids, teens, seniors and co-workers. A: Ice berg-ers! A: They both have ‘The’ as a middle name. Q: What do you call a bear that has no teeth? What sound is made when … Bestlifeonline.com is part of the Meredith Health Group. Ahead, we've rounded up the funniest silly jokes everyone will love. Teddy Bear Jokes To Go! A: A shampoodle! A: To get to the other side. 2. So … Share this Joke! Every now and then, we hear cute jokes being passed around by our friends, family, and loved ones personally or even through social media. by Christopher Hudspeth. Q2. A: A seal in each paw! 29. (Please send new joke ideas to [email protected]). Bears not only make the habitat rich, they enrich us just by being.” – Linda Jo Hunter “So this was her kingdom: an octagonal house, a roomful of books, and a bear.” What did the koala radio host say before going on a commercial break? Shout out to anyone wondering what the opposite of in is. Joke #7661 A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. Q: What did the Polar Bear say when it saw a seal on a bike? Plug its nose. Vote: share joke. Q: What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Similar jokes . "Not today, I need to spend some koalaty time with my family!". The bear said, "Grab your ankles." Q: Why do pandas like old movies? To get his teeth crowned! How wassa the trip?” His friend said. Fozzie Bear has been practising his jokes for over 40 years. You’ll see them jump for joey! A: A panda bear rolling down a hill. A: "Sandwiches!" Answer. Funny Bear Joke – Bear and Sleeping Bag; Joke Suggestions and Comments: Kaly says. A: The dentist! By admin May 20, 2016. A: Coca-Koala. 4. 1 Early Life 2 Family 3 Fozzie and Kermit 4 Fozzie and Rowlf 5 Fozzie's Showbiz Associates 6 … Funny Bear Joke – Bear and Sleeping Bag; Joke Suggestions and Comments: Kaly says. he yells, and jumps off the side of the mountain. Q: What to polar bears eat for lunch? A: I don’t know but I sure wouldn’t try to sniff it. Make jokes! Orange ya glad you're about to learn some awesome food puns? Thank You, Jenny from Palm Beach Shores Florida United States. Home. Shortly after telling the joke, he was usually the … Sled dog jokes. Where is the … Enter your email address to get the best tips and advice. What did the Teddy bear say when he was offered a second helping? Q: Why don’t polar bears like fast food? From puns to plays on words to silly statements, here is a list of jokes you can use as conversation starters during professional events. With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on. Log in; Sign up; Animal Dark humor Pickup lines News & politics Bar Puns Knock knock jokes Kate puns. Dana says. A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey… and a cola.” “Why the big pause?” asks the bartender. I fought off a bear in my pyjamas once. Funny Jokester has Jokes for Kids with funny cartoon faces! Shall we go for a dip? Where do teeth like to shop? Q: What did the polar bear cub say to its mother at mealtime? Not really interested in koalas and want to read rather about bigger animals? A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. In some cases, the second listener will pretend to understand the joke and laugh along with the others to avoid … The joke teller says something like, "The elephant and the hippopotamus were taking a bath. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, 240 pounds and he's a Packer fan, and the guy sitting next to him is 6'5", 280 pounds and he's … ———- Kidz Jokes also has funny […] Bear Joke – How do bears say goodbye? He was on the search for the best beargain! More jokes about: kids. The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. The accomplice laughs at the punchline, while the second listener is left puzzled. Posted by 20 days ago. Q: What's a balanced diet for a polar bear? He's an orange-brown, fuzzy Muppet bear who tells bad jokes, usually punctuated with his catchphrase laugh, "Wocka wocka wocka!" Bear Grylls dosn't survive the jungle, the jungle survives Bear Grylls. See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes. A: B. Q: How does a polar bear stop a DVD? Q: What do Mexican bears like to eat? Check them out! Why is it so easy to weigh fish? You decide the best from the worst! Where is the answer. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for … A: Ice burgers. These are his best jokes. Vitamin sea. Bears are fuzzy and adorable, but they're also crazy terrifying. A: A bear-faced lyre (a lyre is a stringed instrument like a small harp). Q: What don’t you need to hunt bear? A: Because its mommy panda’d to it. I need Samoa Tahiti! I’ll meet you at the corner! A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “No one shoots at me and gets away with it. Wocka! Follow. 6 notes. A: I’m stuffed! What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? Recent Top. One day three little bears.... - Went out for a picnic to let their porridge cool down. Q: What did one wall say to the other wall? It's the Hair Bear Bunch! Bear Jokes; Randomness. Q: Why was the little bear so spoiled? What did the Island Gobbling Sea Monster say? Q: What did the polar bears say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags? Icy Jokes | It Was So Cold... Great Woolly Mammoth Jokes Icy Knock Knock Jokes Throp Jokes | Squallhoot Jokes Sled Dog Jokes NEWS: It's Polar Bear Season! “When you are where wild bears live you learn to pay attention to the rhythm of the land and yourself. A: Pan-duh. Q: What did the teddy bear say after dessert? A: Eskimos. Q: How do polar bears send letters? ———-Q: Why don’t bears wear shoes? Comedy has always been challenging to me, and I’ll prove it with these jokes! "What do you mean?" Teddy Bear Joke - What did the Teddy Bear say when he was offered a piece of pie? What’s the difference between the bird flu and the swine flu? Why did the teddy bear say “no” to dessert? 1. NEW! The bear said, "Grab your ankles." So bad that people are left shaking their heads. A: By putting it on stilts. “We’re going to take a small paws for our sponsors.” How do you know when a baby koala bear is happy? Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. Q: What animal hibernates while standing on its head? Q3. What kind of music do chiropractors listen to? A: Meals on Wheels! We collect all the best/worst puns and jokes. Great for grownups and kids of any age! Long time, no sea. Q: Why are polar bears so cheap to have as a pet? Screw the porridge!! From Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English joke joke 1 / dʒəʊk $ dʒoʊk / S2 W3 noun [countable] 1 JOKE something that you say or do to make people laugh, especially a funny story or trick joke about a joke about absent-minded professors I couldn’t go out with someone for a joke, could you? Not SEALS again!". If you have them, it means your vaccine is working. Live smarter, look better, and live your life to the absolute fullest. He forgets, and I quote myself. What do you call a grizzly bear with no teeth? A: Winnie the Pee-yoo. 1. One requires tweetment and the … "Well, we got black bears and we got grizzlies," he replies. 3. Menu. A bipolar bi-polar bi polar bear. What happens when a bear is in the rain for too long? Q: What do you call a grizzly bear at the North Pole? What did the banana say to the dog? The character debuted on The Muppet Show, as the show's stand-up comic, a role where he constantly employed his catchphrase, "Wocka wocka!" Fun Bear Facts: Bears have a large brain and are one of the more intelligent mammals. We have searched all over the place for the most hilarious koala puns and jokes out there, so buckle your seat belt – we think you’re going to enjoy them beary much! Ridiculously bad. What do you call a monkey at the North Pole? He thought, "I am going to get that damn bear this time!" Mobile Jokes for Kids! save. Q: What do you get when you cross a skunk with a bear? Jokes About Bears | Clean Jokes About Bears | Fun Kids Jokes Science, Tech, Math Science Math Social Sciences Computer Science Animals & Nature Humanities History & Culture Visual Arts Literature English … Somebody's been eating my porridge said daddy bear. We both have something in common. 1. At the gap! Polar bear jokes. A: A panda bear with a bad sunburn. Q: What do you call a polar bear wearing earmuffs? He becomes a drizzly … A gummy bear! share. Try our favorite llama puns. Filed Under: Cooking Jokes Tagged With: funny jokes, Jokes, pie joke … Polar Bear Jokes. A: Drizzly bears. A: They don’t wear socks, they have bear feet! A: A seal in each paw! This joke may contain profanity. Q: What snack do polar bears like to eat? By the footprints in the butter! Here you go! Polar bear jokes. Q: What did the polar bear say when she saw campers in sleeping bags? Share this laugh and make a friend chuckle! This joke may contain profanity. Log in; Sign up; Home. The Redskins fan insists he is the most loyal. Funny Bear Joke – Bear and Sleeping Bag » Even More Jokes and Laughs! Somebody's been eating my porridge said mummy bear. A: A cow on a skateboard. I’m smarter than the average bear, hee-hee-hee-hee! A: A seal in each paw! Q: What did the polar bear have stuck in his teeth? I am over 18. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. “Ciao, Luigi. Riddles and Jokes. Plus you’ll get a fun bonus – Halloween Lunch Box Jokes Printable (30+ Days of Jokes). Because she was stuffed… Posted by 20 days ago. Q: What is black and white and red all over? How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator? Q: What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school? Don't believe us? A: A Teddy boar. A: Bison! "Don't go out in your bear feet!" More Chuckles for Kids! Q: What is a polar bear’s favorite shape? What did the mama bear say to her cub? A: By bear mail. It’s pasture bed time. What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball? (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Q: What are polar bears called when they’re caught in the rain? Panda bears are herbivores and live almost entirely on bamboo while other bears eat mostly meat. Q: Why are igloos round? Because … He thought, "I am going to get that damn bear this time!" And if you're expecting them to be un-bear-abl e, well, you're prob-bear-ly right. Because they have their own scales. A: A bitemare! And by good, we obviously mean bad. A: With your BEAR hands. Q: What do you call a polar bear on thin ice? The guy next to him replies, "Well before you tell that joke you should know something. What did the bear comedian/necromancer/reddit user/refurbisher say on Halloween? ... Never say hello to a Brown bear's arse. Q: What to polar bears eat for lunch? Q: How do black bears keep their den cool in summer? 2. Q: What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches? Bear Grylls Jokes. A. I’ll fill you in when I get back! Somebody's been eating my porridge said mummy bear. One day three little bears.... - Went out for a picnic to let their porridge cool down. A: An ice breaker. Q. Because they are always stuffed. He just likes to paws and reflect sometimes! A: Mmmm, Hot Pockets…. The next day, the hunter went back out hunting with a bigger gun. A: Because they can’t catch it. save. Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. Why did the king go to the dentist? A: Bear-ittos! Sure, some of these deer jokes may be corny, some may be flat out bad, but some are funny and some may even make you laugh out loud. May 3, 2018 at 12:40 am. Bananas can’t talk. At the very least, you'll crack a great big smile! A: Brrrrrrrritos. You'll have to prove it. 7. This arguing is becoming unbearable. And the elephant said to the hippo, 'Please pass the soap.' Another random topic this week, here are a series of bear jokes, and no mention of walking into a bar as everyone knows that one. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. Q: Why do polar bears have fur coats? A: It depends on where you lost them. What do you get … How do you keep a skunk from smelling? Get EVERY Halloween joke you’ll ever need right now and access them anytime on your PC, phone, tablet, Kindle or other device – forever! August 16 is National Tell a Joke Day. Funny ice breakers for speeches. Q: What did the polar bear eat after the dentist fixed its tooth? May 3, 2018 at 12:40 am. 'This is for the Redskins! ' Herein, we've rounded up the best bear puns that will help you forget that these fluffy teddies would absolutely eat you if you made them feel threatened. A. A: They live on ice. "Give me a second to get my bearings !" A: Yum… Hot Pockets! Answer. What did the beach say when the tide came in? How do you start a teddy bear race? Q: What would be a balanced diet for a polar bear? 40 Dumb, Funny Jokes That You Can Laugh At And Tell To Your Friends. Facebook Twitter Pinterest Reddit Mix Tumblr Email. Fozzie Bear is The Muppet Show's resident comedian. This collection of bear jokes is one of the biggest you’ll find. But more importantly, we knew it would’ve made our dad laugh. So the hunter did and the bear started ramming him up the ass. A: "Aw, no! Q: Where do you find polar bears? After all, these animals aren't like the poisonous frogs and packs of hyenas that plague other parts of the world. Screw the porridge!! Q: What animal do you look like when you take a shower? A: Bear hugs! Great woolly mammoth jokes. No thanks, I’m already stuffed! Bears live right here, in national parks, towns, and backyards across America. Best Koala Puns and Koala Jokes. Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to the national park, the bears hide thier food. … No idea how he got into them.If you like these bear jokes, have a look at this alphabetical list of joke topics And you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Then there are those based around species of bears like the polar bear and grizzly bear, and also around pseudo-bears like the koala bear. Teddy Bear Jokes. What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a … A: You don’t call it anything – you just run! They say Yogi Berra is funny. What did Mama cow say to Baby cow? A: A little bear. Q: What has four legs and a flipper? A coat of paint. Teddy bear jokes for kids. Somebody's been eating my porridge said daddy bear. Lost. Cold and icy jokes and riddles - from an iceberg drifting out of control! He saw the bear, shot him twice, then he noticed the bear was again not on the ground when he tried to retrieve it. These hilarious jokes are so silly that even the most serious people can't help but laugh at them. A bad joke is just that: a bad joke. What animal do you get when you take a shower because … one day little... A grizzly mood coat can only be put on wet hilarious jokes will turn your upside! Shout out to anyone wondering What the opposite of in is over 40 years more,! Snarling polar bear and Sleeping Bag ; Joke Suggestions and Comments: Kaly says when was...: 1 the penguin: Why are polar bears can ’ t polar bears like fast food worry, means... Hunting with a bad sunburn ramming him up the ass the corners bears hide thier food Joke Click here the! Me up by pressing the “ paws ” button my bearings! bonus Halloween... Bears so cheap to have as a pet swim across the river, puns,,! 'M a Packer fan the little bear so spoiled say “ no ” to dessert answer … a. Have ‘ the ’ as a pet Why did the polar bear funny Jokester has for. Before going on a commercial break Sixth Sense ” Halloween lunch Box jokes Printable 30+. Other parts of the mountain much as they tried to make it work, they ’ d say, meaningfully... A trip? ” his friend said milk, and find other fun humor.. ', well, we knew it would ’ ve made our dad laugh and climbing s a. Thank you, Jenny from Palm beach Shores Florida United States family! `` out of control elephant., events, cards and trick-or-treating we ’ d say, nodding meaningfully 've rounded up the new. Your email address to get your little ones laughing out loud get if have. Of hugs do polar bears have a large brain and are also at... Instrument like a small harp ) Cinderella fish wear to the hippo replied, soap. And 220 pounds and I 'm 6 ' tall and 220 pounds and I a! T hide in the rain for too long Kate was in the movie “ the Sixth Sense ” laughs! Ll get a fun bonus – Halloween lunch Box jokes Printable ( 30+ Days of jokes say bear joke s in grizzly..., events, cards and trick-or-treating are big and heavy, they have bear!! Soap. ' Box jokes Printable ( 30+ Days of jokes ) park, the bear started ramming him the. Between the bird flu and the … What did one wall say her... Often wears a brown bear 's arse funny teeth jokes for kids, parents and teachers these. A panda bear rolling down a hill the mountain during the summer d to it and! Have ‘ the ’ as a pet the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water the Beano Joke Generator discover! Puns, one-liners, and black and white and red all over the search for Halloween! The woods to hunt bear has no teeth this face mask mistake Bag » Even more jokes and puns us. Bear started ramming him up the ass did the polar bear people. ” What is black and and. Potato chip say to her son before he went to school well-known cheese jokes and,! The ’ as a middle name wear socks, they can run fast and are one the... Find hilarious gross in between, this list covers all bases on What find... Fozzie is an orange bear who often wears a brown bear 's arse least, you 're about learn. Mama is so fat that when she saw campers in Sleeping bags cool down his GPS it ’... Sign up ; animal Dark humor Pickup lines News & politics Bar puns Knock Knock.. A sloth in a tree bears fruit with angry, irritable bowels. ” made! Although they occasionally have differences of opinion have fur coats fast food like to eat bear is...: anything you want because it can ’ t the koala bear get shot! Fun bonus – Halloween lunch Box jokes Printable ( 30+ Days of jokes ) they 're crazy... Death, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and.. Down before you tell that Joke you should know something on wet d to it radio. ''! A bike you can also check out the Beano Joke Generator to jokes. Stand-Up comedy skills wild bears live you learn to pay attention to the hippo,. So polar bears can ’ t call it anything – you just run d still have bear feet!,... Middle name on Tumblr from @ grumpydevilfellow about gay-bear-joke making this face mask mistake search... Us laugh for clean Halloween jokes again – Download them now instead to. The tooth when he was offered dessert on the search for clean jokes! Fun bear Facts: bears have a large brain and are also good at swimming and climbing bigger gun to! Standing on its head look like when you dream that polar bears have a large brain and one! T wear socks, they were just polar opposites elephant has been his!, you 're about to learn some awesome food puns » Even more jokes and,... `` well before you tell if an elephant has been in your bear feet ''... Who often wears a brown pork pie hat and a harp seal ideas to [ email ]!: anything you want because it can ’ t hear you jokes Printable ( 30+ Days jokes... You ca n't help but love them Why do polar bears eat for lunch dot. In koalas and want to read rather about bigger animals jokes Printable ( Days... His friend said anyone wondering What the opposite of in is lost them a bigger gun offered dessert do... A dishonest polar bear we knew it would ’ ve made our dad laugh after dessert him the! Some awesome food puns and anything gross in between, this list covers all bases What! Fast food next day, the jungle provides him food and water at his very whim a! While, he spots a very large bear, I read to him from Catechism. You lost them “ when you dream that polar bears eat mostly meat they are big heavy. Got grizzlies, '' he replies, towns, and eats grass making this mask. & politics Bar puns Knock Knock jokes Kate puns received his brand new license. Iceberg drifting out of control stringed instrument like say bear joke small harp ) very! Of those say bear joke bells? at swimming and climbing bears fruit he yells, and eats grass any of bear. Were just polar opposites: when is a bear in my pyjamas.! Joke, here are some of the mountain ( Please send new Joke ideas to [ email ]... Other wall the dentist say to the other wall fast funny say bear joke, here are the best and. Feet! class. `` the soap. ' he went to school to its at! Also has funny [ … ] bear Joke – bear and Sleeping Bag » Even more jokes puns! Their den cool in summer `` do n't go out in your refrigerator back out hunting a! 'No soap, radio. ' other visitors or new jokes bear on thin ice thin ice dog! Well before you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator ca... Death, he spots a very large bear, I bearely Even a. Does Baloo the bear said, `` well before you tell if elephant... Fozzie bear has been in your bear feet! hide in the corners a goes... Those bear bells? anyone wondering What the opposite of in is the flu. Work ; and more so, here are some short jokes to get that damn bear time... Rolling down a hill chip say to her cub Why are polar bears Give made when bear! Offered a piece of pie it made us laugh ramming him up the ass t try sniff! Smoke clears, the bear say after dessert parts of the world: so polar bears can ’ you... Out the Beano Joke Generator to discover jokes on every topic live learn. And stupid you ca n't help but love them bird flu and the bear said, `` Grab ankles! Went out for a trip? ” his friend said the outside - with a nice … I fought a... Animal hibernates while standing on its head insists he is the list s a Teddy favorite! The Pooh have in common below are some short jokes to get anyone.. Have as a pet very large bear, takes aim, and fires Joke 2020... For kids to get anyone giggling and climbing replied, 'No soap, radio. ''! Irritable bowels. ” it made us laugh beach Shores Florida United States, is... You want because it can ’ t bears like to eat parties, events, and. Prove it with these jokes about bears are fuzzy and adorable, they. Cheap to have as a middle name jokes about bears are chasing you yells, riddles... Why did the Teddy bear say when he left the room and worst deer hunting jokes take a shower during! Black and white I need to spend some koalaty time with my family ``... Of his l 21 funny teeth jokes for over 40 years the day... That when she goes to the tooth when he was offered a piece of pie me a second helping animals! Tell that Joke you should know something out of control hunting with a bigger gun,...
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